Questioning
by
Moyra

As I look upon the rising sun
Itís fingers pushing past the clouds
I feel itís light blessing my life
Chasing the shadows away.
How could I have been so blind?
Why did I refuse to see?

In the hollows of my heart
I have loved more than one before
But always I have made the choice
To always leave one behind.
Why did I not see the hunger in my soul?
Why did I refuse to believe?

When I met my love,
To him I said I would be true
I swore that he would be my only
And for awhile I could believe it.
What was I thinking?
Why did I refuse my nature?

For years we were content
Working side by side
Together we started a family
And yet darkness crept inside.
Where had it come from?
Why did I refuse to notice?

I knew my needs were not fulfilled
My heart hungered for more
My soul called out
But my Love did not hear.
How could it hurt so?
Why did he refuse to care?

Then I knew he did not see
The stress of life had blinded him
My hungers went unfulfilled
My life felt empty and in need.
How could I change this?
Why did I refuse to leave?

I knew not how to fill the emptiness
My anger and resentment grew
Until my Love he saw the pain
And wondered what he could do.
Why did it take so long?
Why did I refuse to say?

Together we talked all night
Trying to find an answer to these questions
As I told him what was in my heart
He knew the answer to our troubles
Why didnít I trust him before?
Why did I refuse to believe in him?

Together we chose a Lover for me
Someone to care for my heart
To tend the garden of my soul
And the emptiness was filled.
Why didnít we do this before?
Why did I refuse to be me?

Now my questions have been answered
And the light of dawn is no longer feared
My heart is full, my soul at ease
All for the love of two good men
I have been true to my nature
And true me, and true to the ones I love.

--Moyra

© Copyright 1999 Moyra

Moyra